JAPH – Awesome Code Obfuscation

6/06/2010

Every so often I stumble across something that really just leaves me dumbfounded. The only valid response seems to be “… Fascinating!”

The latest is this clever JAPH consisting solely of keywords.

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not exp log srand xor s qq qx xor
s x x length uc ord and print chr
ord for qw q join use sub tied qx
xor eval xor print qq q q xor int
eval lc q m cos and print chr ord
for qw y abs ne open tied hex exp
ref y m xor scalar srand print qq
q q xor int eval lc qq y sqrt cos
and print chr ord for qw x printf
each return local x y or print qq
s s and eval q s undef or oct xor
time xor ref print chr int ord lc
foreach qw y hex alarm chdir kill
exec return y s gt sin sort split

In short; The Perl community has a meme going where you are supposed to write a snippet returning the String “just another perl hacker” in the most convoluted and obfuscated way possible.

This gem does exactly that. It’s beautiful in that there are no Strings in there, only valid Perl keywords, and it’s perfectly justified. For some reason this kind of useless stuff really appeals to me at a deep level. I fear a couple of hours may be lost to trying to create a clever JAAH.

This was posted earlier on ria.creuna.com.
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Heads and bodies

9/04/2009

I always knew this day would come. My claim to brief internet fame and niche uniqueness is at an end. It’s just too awesome an idea 1 for someone else not to have it.

Heads and Bodies

There’s no denying that both her head and body outpretties mine by far, so my only counterpoint here is that A: Mine is bigger 2, which everyone knows is better; and B: I feel fairly certain that mine came first.

Ah well. Now we’re a guy and a girl with this tattoo, so unless you’re a baby you better back off. This is our territory.

  1. Objectively speaking, of course
  2. And really not as skewed as it appears in this photo. Really.
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Prattle of the Pettiest

9/04/2009

Java Action Script Faceoff
Original photo by Flickr user alexerde. Bastardized thoroughly by yours truly.
These two posts by Keith Peters do a marvelous job at summarising an age-old frustration that most ActionScript developers and I’m certain developers in many other languages, have either faced or actively promulgated.
Namely the attitude that while my language is certainly a robust and decent Object-Oriented Programming language, yours is obviously the stuff of programmer playgrounds and can hardly be considered programming at all.
I’ve broadly steered clear of participating in these pissing contests, but I’m sick to death of them and wish the collective programming community would grow the hell up and quit Balkanizing 1 since we all seem to have flourishing and genuinely resourceful communities in each our camps.

The first post.
The second post that explains the first post to the hard of thinking, but is still worth a read to us really smart folks.

  1. Apologies to Aral Balkan who of course represents anything but what this term has come to mean.
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Princesses gone bad

1/04/2009

Princesses gone bad Link

I’m a sucker for nice illustrations, and these are pretty damn awesome.

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Ventriloquism done right

24/03/2009

This is funny to me. Is it funny to you? If so, will you be my best friend and invite me to your birthday party? No? Alright, nonetheless;

2 Comments