Control Option Command

No no. I’m not about to start a kerfuffle about changing the location and / or name of my blog again. I just wanted to make sure you’ve heard about the new ria.creuna.com site.

Basically me and the other RIA-developers broke out and started our own blog. If you like the code, geek and tech content from this site you should be sure to check it out. For example you could start with my huge post about URL Recognition, or you could read how my co-worker exposes the clickTAG sham for the lousy stinky piece of bad stuff it is.

Did I mention I’m currently going to the dentist about once a week to fix my rotten teeth? Well I am, and it’s a ball.

I’f she’d told me she’d pitch a fucking tent in my mouth I would have brought marshmallows.

If you have been around on the web for ten years or more you will remember (or maybe even filled the role) of the mythical “WebMaster”. The WebMaster would design and program your site. He (or she… but lets be honest girls. Mostly he) would publish your articles and fix your site when broken. He’d do some voodoo behind the scene and something very close to what you wanted would happen. He’d tell you what would work on the net and what wouldn’t. He would not be questioned. He was The WebMaster.

Ok, so usually the WebMaster was someone’s cousin who knew HTML, where to cut’n paste JavaScript snippets from and generally no marvel to behold, but it was a title not to be taken lightly and godsdamnit we held it in high regard.

But I’m not here to wax poetic about the lost title of The WebMaster. I’m here to talk about how the position, once highly esteemed, as a “Jack of all trades” ¹ in, well, WebMastery; fits into the calculation nowadays.

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I always knew this day would come. My claim to brief internet fame and niche uniqueness is at an end. It’s just too awesome an idea ¹ for someone else not to have it.

There’s no denying that both her head and body outpretties mine by far, so my only counterpoint here is that A: Mine is bigger ², which everyone knows is better; and B: I feel fairly certain that mine came first.

Ah well. Now we’re a guy and a girl with this tattoo, so unless you’re a baby you better back off. This is our territory.

If you managed to visit this blog in the 10 minutes or so before this post goes live you might have been slightly befuddled by the fact that your address bar doesn’t say parallaxdenigrate.net as you might have expected, but rather ctrloptcmd.com.

So I’ve finally moved the blog to a new domain, and let me tell you; It wasn’t easy. Oh, exporting and importing the MySQL tables was a breeze and implementing the 301 redirect wasn’t too complicated. No, the challenge was in deciding on a domain name that wasn’t already taken. In the process I probably bought about 15 domains just to get one I liked enough to use.

Now, gentle reader, you might ask yourself “What the fuck is supposed to be the point of all this?“, to which I might reply; “Well, even if parallaxdenigrate.net was a amusing domain name to the likes of me who are blessed with an odd sense of humor, it’s not exactly what you’d call memorable. Try to tell someone to type in ‘parallaxdenigrate.net’ into their browser and you’ll see what I mean.” You, in turn may exclaim something along the lines of “Are you retarded? How the blazing hell is ‘ctrloptcmd.com’ easier to remember than your previous parrylaxy thingie? You suck. I’m not gonna read your blog anymore.” at which juncture in our fascinating exchange I might counter with “Aha! But if you just remember controloptioncommand.com, which naturally redirects to this, abbreviated form of the same sequence, I think you’ll find it immensely easier to keep lodged in your cerebrum the unified resource locator corresponding to this, my humble blog.” at which point you’ve probably left so I’d be talking to myself.

Regardless! Here it is, the new and not at all improved version 1.000001 of parallaxdenigrate controloptioncommand.

Although I’ll be keeping parallaxdenigrate.net online for a while just to make sure nobody gets lost, I’d strongly encourage you to update your bookmarks and feeds.